Somethings Aren't Meant To Be

I knew my words would punch her right in the face.  I attempted to soften them, as I do every time when faced with this conversation piece. My voice was calm and even toned yet despite my best wishes for the words to land gently on the receiving end, they delivered a jaw-breaking blow.  

It had been three years since I’ve seen Laura.  When we first met, we became instant friends so it was a huge drag when I broke up with her brother.  Actually, breaking up with him was easy.  Knowing I would no longer enjoy the same relationship with Laura was heartbreaking, though.  I was also quite close to my then-boyfriend’s mom who makes the best fudge on the planet.  

Even after the break up, Laura and I stayed in touch for a while and not a day went by without her telling me that she wished I would get back together with her brother.  “Somethings just aren’t meant to be”, I’d reply every single time to the point she began saying it with me. Though my response ended with a period, there was an ellipsis that begged for more “....and plus your brother is a lying, cheating jerk so....”    Somehow I always managed to keep the latter part inside my head.

The last time I saw Laura, I was single after having just ended my relationship with her brother.  Just yesterday we reconnected in a posh Central Phx Eatery.  And, I’m still single.

It was heartwarming to hear everything going on in her life and to learn that her mom still makes fudge.  “Enough about me!!” she said.  “Last time I was on Face Book, you had just met Aaron...GIRL!  He’s adorable!”  

...Yes...he is adorable.   

I try softening the rest of my words.   

“Oh Lisa.  I am so sorry!”  Her eyes welling up with tears.  “Honey...please tell me you weren’t the one who found him!”  

I take a deep breath and consider lying through my teeth.  But, instead I speak the truth.  I can almost see the blood dripping from her nose at the final blow.

She melts down, shaking and in tears.   And, I recognize myself in her.

The waitress breezed on over to refill my coffee and immediately sees Laura in distress.  The knot that had formed in my throat clenched onto my voice like a tight fist rendering me unable to speak for a split second.  Finally, taking a deep breath, I dealt with the awkwardness in the only way I know how.  

“I just broke up with her...she won’t find anyone better than me”, I explained to the waitress.

Through snot and tears Laura laughed while blubbering the words “I broke up with HER!”.  The relieved waitress offered her a napkin which served to further smear the mascara underneath Laura’s eyes.

“Laura.  I’m okay...most days.  I put in a lot of hard work for PTSD at the therapist office.  I sold my house.  I’m getting a new one built.  I’ll start a brand new chapter.  I miss him every single day and I don’t understand why things happen the way they do.  But, so far I’m upright and I’ll come out okay.”

I couldn’t help but notice the look of sheer sadness on her face.  But she nodded in agreement.  

“You know....somethings just aren’t meant to be” I added.  

“Somethings are not meant to be”, she agreed.